Urban Jungle

Ok so there’s this shopping centre that was built last year or the year before or some time, I don’t know the date Ok but it might have been opened on Halloween. So...specific. anyways, it’s in Shepherd’s Bush and it was quite a brewharhar when it opened (ACTUAL LOLZ at brewharhar btw, like I say that all the time) because it’s a mega big shopping centre that’s meant to be better than Bluewater. Side comment: Bluewater actually ROX cos it’s the shape of a triangle so you can get around it really easily and it is nice and clean and has millions of coffee shops where your mate from 6th form works and gives you free coffees and also lets you chief the big mugs. Only probz is that it’s in a quarry in Kent. Shepher’ds Bush one is in Shepherd’s Bush which makes things a lot easier..espesh for me cos I work in Kensington. But anyways.

They made a whoopdidoo about it cos it’s in central London and all big and shit. And they built a new tube station for it. Actually I think they built three different station for it. So you can use 20 different lines to get there. But when they built the platforms they built them too narrow and you couldn’t get off the train. Or something. Oh here, just look at this.

So yeah. It’s a bit famous. And it’s called Westfield. Now, I think this is a bit of a rubbish name. Westfield. My mum thought it was called Springfield. But that’s not why it’s bad. I just thought that was funny.
It’s rubbish. I mean, most shopping centres are rubbish. Lakeside. Bluewater. Big ugly Building by the side of a Muddy Puddle. In Maidstone I think it’s called Chequers. In Bromley South it’s called The Glades. Btw you should get the train through Bromley South cos they mention The Glades on the train sign on the platform. Blatant sponsoring.

So yeah, they’re all a bit shit. The one in Manchester is called The Trafford Centre and I like that for some reason. City pride maybe? Although they should have a Main Road one too for the city fans.

Hehe, get me pretending I know about football. And care. Cos I don’t know OR care about football, when it’s on the telly it makes me feel sick. I think it’s the weird sound of the crowd mixed with the bright green of the grass. Whatever whatever. I’ve gone on a tangent to Tangier, as my old mum used to say.

But back to Westfield. Oh! Little Tangier, here, is that when I type Westfield it’s the same font as the sign they use! They must use Bookman at the sign place too.
I was so disappointed when they called it Westfield then. We’ve established that. Why couldn’t they call it URBAN JUNGLE. That's rubbish actually. Or they could have called it PARADISE BUSH. That's bad too. But it’s Shepherd’s Bush-y. But it sounds rude. Like a “blue” film. But they COULD have called it WONDERLAND. I like that one actually. And it begins with a W so they wouldn’t have been too upset with the change. From Westfield.

But even though Westfield is rubbish..get this.
They’re building a sister centre in Stratford, east London. Cos of the ‘Limpics you know? And they’re making it all nice down there now. So they’re building this sister shopping centre. It’s in EAST London. Westfield is in WEST London. Westfield in WEST and a new one in EAST. So what are they calling it? They’re calling it Westfield.

Yeah. That’s right. It blew my mind and made me really angry and I can’t believe how STUPID PEOPLE ARE!!!!!!!